Monday, 18 January 2010


I have so much frustration building up and so many questions in my head - yet they are the same as when I first got married, nothing changes and nothing has moved on...not even sure its worth writing about as surely its just the same old story to everyone else - which I just have to keep on living! Groundhog day - it never ends.....

Friday, 15 January 2010

Tired of the same old story..

So, here it goes a new year a new decade...yet the same old story for me!
Nothing has changed and even when I know I havent done anything wrong - somehow my Father-in-law makes it wrong! Celebrate husbands birthday the way he wants to - then I didnt think about them and that they deserve to be included! Work extra hours as I need to further my career - then I am never at home, yet they want money from us? Will I ever be right? Will I ever feel that my actions won't be questioned?

However, today what has hurt me the most is how my parents are getting the blame for everything! If what we do is wrong, then my parents must have taught me. If we dont go and see them - then my parents must be like that! If husband comes to see my parents - then me and my parents must have forced him to see them!!!!

I'm sorry - I can handle everything that is thrown my way - but not when it comes to my parents! My parents are my idols! What my mum has done for us and her in-laws is what I have learnt and instilled in me as my morals and duties. From the way my parents love each other and show affection to the way they respect and look after each others parents. YET to this day my FIL believes THEY are sly to try and take us away from him!!
My in-laws have made my parents cry, have abused them in front of me, have said all sorts behind their back and yet I have not said anything! But should I stay quiet? Am I not disrespecting my parents by staying quiet? I dont care if my FIL tells me off, thinks I'm evil but when he says its my parents fault thats when my blood boils - and today it is at its brim where I am so close to telling him exactly what I think - the only thing stopping me is fear of what it will do to my husband! What do I do??
If it was the other way round, would my husband stand up for his parents? Should I as the woman even dream of standing up for my parents? Do I have that right? Is it becase we dont have a brother that my in-laws can get away with it? or is it because they are the girls parents that my in-laws believe they can say as they like as who will care?